The Magnificent Mega Rat


Rob the Rat was
Hungry one day,
‘I want some food,
For which I don’t have to pay!’

He scurried about,
Then he saw something green,
It was brighter than anything
He’d ever seen.

He thought it looked tasty,
So he made haste,
Little did he know,
It was toxic waste!

When he took a nibble,
He grew six feet tall,
He then stumbled backwards,
Destroying a wall.

Rob then said,
‘Well, fancy that,
I’m big and I’m strong,
I’m now Mega Rat!’

He found an old bin bag,
And made it a cape,
‘Now I’m a hero,
And I’m really great!’

He then heard screaming,
And it wasn’t a prank,
For a supervillain was
Robbing the bank.

‘Stand back,’ said Rob,
‘I’ll show this villain what for!’
But when he came in on the scene,
The people screamed more!

‘What a horrendous mutant!’
‘That thing should be dead!’
‘Can’t we be saved by
A turtle instead?’

They all thought Rob ugly,
They thought him obscene,
An abomination of God,
Something from a bad dream.

‘These people fear me,
And they want me to die,’
Thought Rob, ‘But I’ll save them all,
And be redeemed in their eyes!

‘Once I stop this villain,
They’ll fear me no more!
They’ll love and adore me,
And give me applause!’

But a surprise lay in wait,
For our heroic rat,
For who was robbing the bank?
A big evil cat!


It was Dr. Meow,
Who was committing the crime,
She used to be human,
But became a feline!

The sight of a cat,
Left Rob frozen in fear,
He had such strength and power,
But couldn’t come near!

So how ends the
Magnificent Mega Rat?
Well, Dr. Meow
Is now very fat.

The Movie Goblin


Today I went to the movies,
I bought popcorn and ice cream,
I got my ticket torn and then I sat,
Looking at the screen.

As soon as the trailers finished,
I heard a wicked laugh,
I turned and saw a figure,
That couldn’t be one of the staff,

He was bright green with pointed ears,
Grinning like an evil clown,
I gasped in shock, for I knew,
The Movie Goblin had come to town!

Yes, the Movie Goblin,
Believe you and me, he’s real,
He lurks in the cinema,
And curses every reel.

You wanna watch an action film?
Fast-paced and adventurous?
He loads them up with monologues,
Ones lengthy and pretentious!

If you take your kiddies,
To a talking animal flick,
He’ll put in loads of fart jokes,
Enough to make you sick!

Going to a horror show?
With him, you should be wary,
He makes the monsters silly,
So they’re no longer scary.

So I ran out of my seat towards him,
Knocking my popcorn on the floor,
I dumped my ice cream on his head,
And threw him out the door!

He ran away, and I sat back down,
To watch what I paid to see,
Sadly, even without the Goblin,
It was still a dull movie.